As In Autumn
by Dejana Talis
Summary: This is a songfic about the final deaths of Usagi and Mamoru, in the distant future when they have ruled as Neo Queen Serenity and King Endymion for a long time. This story presents two versions of their deaths.


Author's Notes: 

While working on my really long epic fanfiction I was struck by the inspiration for this one-shot songfic, and decided to take a break from the lengthy tome to write something more solemn and mellow. There are countless BSSM fanfics about the Silver Millennium, the present time shown in the anime and manga, and Crystal Tokyo. I have not yet seen one showing the far end of the great saga that is the lives of Serenity and Endymion. I must confess, since I was inspired to write this I have not searched the Internet to see if this idea has already been done. I would rather pull this from my mind and let it flow into my keyboard without being influenced by existing work.

I'll say it right up front, this is a songfic about the final deaths of Usagi and Mamoru, set in the distant future after they have ruled Crystal Tokyo for a good long time. The story is interwoven with "As In Autumn" by Margot Wagner. If you haven't heard her music, I strongly recommend it. The lyrics are rather depressing on their own but the song is absolutely beautiful. When I realized what the song is about, it gave me shivers the next dozen times I listened to it.

I am trying to appease both those who would prefer the lovers to die in battle and those who would prefer a gentle death from old age by showing both, as parallel universes. I hope this is not too confusing to figure out.

I hope you enjoy my work.  
-Dejana 7/16/2003

* * *

As In Autumn

A Sailormoon Songfic by Dejana Talis

Lyrics from "As In Autumn"  
by Margot Wagner

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink._

* * *

Neo Queen Serenity stood silently beside the bed for a moment, motionless. Her gentle blue eyes were tired and sad, her usual smile invisible among the worry lines that now creased her face. Slowly she reached out a pale hand and lightly brushed a strand of pink hair from the cheek of her sleeping daughter, her greatest treasure.

Young Usagi was not so young any more; she was an adult now, her cotton-candy hair long enough to reach her toes, and she had been married to own Prince, Helios, for many years. Yet, Serenity could not resist this opportunity to be close to her daughter, to caress her again with a motherly hand, a hand now wrinkled slightly with age.

I am proud of you, my daughter, Serenity thought fondly as she stepped silently away. Chibi-Usa-chan.

All was no longer well in Crystal Tokyo. As the Queen carefully closed the door to her daughter's suite, she could again hear the distant explosions from the battlefield. It had been a seemingly endless time of peace and glory ever since the defeat of Nemesis. Now, those perfect years were over.

Although the power of the Silver Crystal had kept Serenity youthful for many, many years, her golden hair had at last taken on streaks of silver. Slowly she walked back toward the throne room, now the headquarters of the defense. Age hindered the Queen's steps as well as a reluctance to return to the reality of today. Her long white dress brushing the smooth crystalline floor, Serenity's mind flew back to happier times. Always, she and her friends had repelled evil and emerged victorious, but this time... She knew she could no longer ignore the dreams and visions that had plagued her ever since the Shinmosei attacked. This time, there would be no return to the life that Crystal Tokyo had always known.

For the past few weeks, the Princess had been fighting alongside the Asteroid Senshi as Sailor Moon, trying to prevent the invaders from penetrating the city. It had taken quite a lot of effort for her parents to convince her to sleep for a while. The Queen's old guardians were leading the defense, their Senshi powers holding them firmly in eternal middle-age. Since the Queen's duty as a soldier had been passed to her daughter, the powers of light had not done the same for Serenity.

Walking through the silent, empty corridors, the Queen's thoughts flew to the many people that should have filled these halls. Most of them were out on the battlefield now, many of them lying motionless, never to rise again. Serenity lifted her hands, cradling the pink henshin locket she had taken from her daughter's room. In her heart she knew what was coming, and that there was only one choice remaining to her. At least her precious child would be safe.

As she approached the throne room Serenity lowered her hands to hide the locket between the folds of her flowing gown. When she arrived, she found the headquarters bustling with frantic activity. People were running, commanders were shouting orders, and King Endymion was standing right in the thick of it, upon the raised dais that held the thrones aloft. Their son-in-law Helios was standing proudly beside him, helping the King to issue his instructions.

The crowd parted before the Queen as she glided toward the dais. When she reached the summit, instead of heading directly toward her seat she edged toward the curtain that covered the wall behind the thrones. Slipping her hand out from the folds of her dress, Serenity slid the locket behind the curtain and let it fall. It would be found eventually, but not soon enough for her daughter to interfere in what Serenity knew to be her own destiny.

Her covert mission completed, the Queen moved to stand beside her beloved husband. The Shinmosei had penetrated Crystal Tokyo and were rapidly progressing through the city. There was no doubt that they would reach the palace soon.--

* * *

Sunlight streamed in the windows of the royal suite, filling the elegant rooms with a golden glow. It was already mid-morning, and the large bed with the ornate headboard was still occupied. The bedcurtains were drawn, but the light still filtered through enough to brighten the face of Neo Queen Serenity.

Lying beside her, his head propped up on one arm, King Endymion gazed fondly upon his soulmate. A faint smile gave life to his cheeks as he watched Serenity sleep, his charcoal eyes tracing every detail of her pale face. Her long eyelashes rested gently upon her cheeks, her lips pursed slightly, rosy in the sunlight. Her skin was no longer as soft as it had once been, and she carried a few wrinkles to mark a long, full life, but Endymion still thought her as beautiful as she had been when they first met. Her blonde hair, now streaked with silver, was free of its usual buns and covered her side of the bed they shared.Delicately, Serenity's eyes fluttered open, still the vibrant blue they had always been. Just like every morning since the day they were married, she smiled up at her husband, who now had crow's feet beside his eyes and a thinner, careworn face. Despite the silver intermingled with his black hair, Serenity was still enchanted by his handsome face.

"Aishiteru, Usako"  
"Aishiteru, Mamo-chan."

The King bent his head to his Queen, and their lips met, the kiss still sending sparks through both of their souls even after all these years. Every morning it was the same. Endymion would wake first and watch Serenity sleep, and their first words to each other would be "I love you." For the rest of the day they would refer to each other as Endymion and Serenity, but their bedroom was their sanctuary, where they could remain eternally Usagi and Mamoru, the young lovers from ages ago. The use of their old pet names for each other, just this once, each morning, kept them sane despite the mature regal personalities they were expected to wrap around themselves as King and Queen. Through this tradition they kept their youth alive within their souls, a shining star to brighten the darkness. Here in their bedroom, they could be their true selves.

Their days were no longer as full as they used to be. The Princess and her husband had taken over most of the day-to-day running of Crystal Tokyo, and the aging royal couple's lives were now made up mostly of formal audiences and public appearances. However, they still held court each day in the throne room, the Princess and Prince taking lower seats for this task. It was here that Endymion finally realized that his world would not remain whole forever.

When the court session had ended, the pair rose from their thrones to wave to the assembled nobility, as usual. Today, however, the Queen looked unusually pale. When she turned to descend from the dais, she swayed, her hands clutched at the empty air, and she sank to her knees on the crystalline platform.

Endymion was at her side in an instant, lifting his love in his arms as she smiled up at him weakly. Several courtiers and servants tried to persuade the King to let them carry her, including his son-in-law, but Endymion stubbornly refused. He knew he was aging, but he had strength enough to carry his precious Serenity.

The healers told the King that Serenity's heart was weakening. It was a natural consequence of age, inevitable.

Inevitable.

The word echoed endlessly in Endymion's head as he carried his wife back to their bedroom.

Inevitable.

Serenity seemed stronger now, but her husband refused to allow her to walk on her own. As she lay her golden head upon his chest, the King put every ounce of effort into holding his arms steady beneath her weight. He would not allow age to deprive him of this pleasure.

The royal couple spent the rest of the day in their suite, seeing visitors and taking care of the little official business they still handled in Endymion's study. In the evening they played several brief games of chess - Serenity had never managed to learn the game properly. In the last game, however, she succeeded in putting up a stronger fight, and it took Endymion a few more moves than usual to capture her queen. Instead of placing the piece beside the others he had taken, he smiled at his wife and slipped it into his breast pocket.

"What are you doing?" Serenity asked, a puzzled look creasing her thinned face more deeply.

"I'm placing my Queen where she belongs," Endymion replied, "right beside my heart. I will never let her go."

The Queen's lips curved upward in a rosy smile, and she stretched her hand across the chessboard to mingle her fingers with those of her King.

As the night deepened, Endymion carried his wife to their bed, undressed her, and laid her gently beneath the luxurious bedclothes. She was as beautiful as ever, her face shining with love for him. After removing his own clothing he slid between the sheets beside her, holding out his arms for her to slip into his embrace. Serenity remained where she lay, lifting one hand to trace Endymion's jawline with her thinned fingers.

"Make love to me, my husband."

It had been quite some time for both of them, as their energy was no longer what it once was, but the passion was still there, honed into a glittering diamond of emotion after years of life together. As they writhed in unison, Endymion gazed into the shining blue eyes of his soulmate. Serenity's gaze was fixed upon him, her face shining in ecstasy as he moved within her, her mouth open and her cheeks glowing with a rosy color they had not held in years. Within those eyes Endymion found the youth and life that he had fallen in love with, that he still loved with all his heart. Even when their throats and intertwined bodies released their passion they kept their eyes locked within each other's gaze, both of them reclaiming a piece of their souls in that instant.

"Aishiteru, Mamo-chan."

"Aishiteru, Usako."

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink.-_

* * *

Neo-Queen Serenity stood tall and proud in front of the main entrance to the palace, her wisdom-lined face set in an expression of grim determination. Around her, the legendary Inner Senshi were grouped at the top of the crystal staircase, looking much younger than the friend they had grown up with. The Princess's Asteroid Senshi had gathered in front of them.

"Please go inside, Queen Serenity," Sailor Mars begged. "We can protect you much easier if you're inside the palace."

With weary eyes Serenity gazed upon the woman who had been her dearest friend throughout their lives. "No. My place is here, defending my kingdom."

The noises of the approaching army grew louder and louder, punctured here and there by the sounds of a brief skirmish between the remaining soldiers and the Shinmosei. There were screams among the towering buildings of the city, and mournful wailing.

"We will defend the kingdom for you, your Highness," Sailor Venus argued desperately. "Please..."

"No, Venus," the Queen replied firmly. "I will stay."

The group whirled around, startled, as the doors behind them flew open with a bang. King Endymion rushed out, flanked by his closest advisors, their daughter's Prince among them. "Serenity!" he cried in alarm, limping slightly on his aging legs. "I did not see you go, I was so worried... What are you doing out here? Hurry, come back inside with me," he urged her.

The Queen shook her head gently. "I must stay here and help protect our people from our enemies, Endymion. That duty is still mine."

Endymion looked about to protest, but when he looked into his wife's eyes he knew she would not be persuaded. "Then I will stay as well," he said boldly. "My eternal duty is to protect you." The King stepped forward to stand at Serenity's side as the front lines of the invading army rounded the corner into the palace courtyard.

The King's advisors rushed to surround the royal couple on the staircase. Prince Helios looked around for a moment with a puzzled expression, then whirled around and dashed back into the palace.

"All of you, go back into the palace," The Queen commanded, sweeping her hand to indicate the advisors and anyone else present who was not a Senshi. When they hesitated, she added "That's an order." Serenity then turned to the Asteroid Senshi. "You four, circle around through the city and attack the enemy from behind," she directed in the same firm voice. A moment later, only the King, Queen, and the four Inner Senshi remained, forming a living barrier between the invaders and the shining palace.

The Shinmosei were flooding into the courtyard now. Leading the charge were a dozen enormous youma, vicious wild creatures whose energy auras betrayed the fact that they held greater power than the group had ever faced before. It was undoubtedly these that had been laying waste to Crystal Tokyo's armies.

Queen Serenity took a deep breath. "My friends-"

"Don't, Usagi-chan," Mars interrupted with a smile, startling Serenity into silence. "It is our duty to stand with you against the enemy, no matter what happens. If that means our story is finally at an end, then so be it."

As the army approached, the four Inner Senshi hurtled down the staircase and sprang into action.--

* * *

Sunlight streamed in the windows of the royal suite, filling the elegant rooms with a golden glow. It was already mid-morning, and the large bed with the ornate headboard was still occupied. The bedcurtains were drawn but the light still filtered through, once again falling upon the pale face of Neo Queen Serenity.

King Endymion awoke, having slept later than usual. After hours of nightmares of watching his Serenity falling into a great abyss, her long hair streaming into darkness, his mind had finally quieted enough to allow him to sleep. As his dark eyes opened to face another day, he realized the bed seemed unusually cold. He turned his head, and his gaze fell upon the still form of his beloved wife.

"Iie," he breathed. No.

As always, the sunlight brought a golden hue to her fair skin and set her hair alight. As always, her loose hair covered her side of the bed they had shared for many years. As always, her long eyelashes lay gently upon her cheeks, and her lips were slightly pursed and curved just barely into a sweet, peaceful smile. Everything was the same as it had been every other morning throughout the existence of Crystal Tokyo, with one exception. Serenity's sleep had become eternal.

Endymion lay there through the morning and into the afternoon, just gazing upon her, his wife's face whiter and thinner than it had ever been. The minutes and hours slipped by and still he waited patiently to see the bright blue eyes that would never again open. She was beautiful, as she always was to her husband's eyes, and her face now shone with an eternal peace that had sprung from a moment of happiness that would somehow last until the end of time, captured within a mind that was now forever silent.

"Aishiteru, Usako. Aishiteru."

* * *

Somewhere a young girl with golden hair was being teased about a failing grade on a test.

Somewhere a newly made Sailor Senshi was being rescued by a mysterious dark-haired gentleman in a tuxedo and a flowing cape.

Somewhere a timid rescuing knight was leaning forward over a sleeping Senshi, gently touching his soft lips to hers, and feeling her body tremble beneath him as their souls resonated in harmony.

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink.-_

* * *

Neo Queen Serenity was still standing at the top of the palace staircase with King Endymion by her side, but the two of them were very much alone. The Shinmosei army had stopped their advance, filling the rear half of the courtyard and the street behind it. The group of youma were assembled at the base of the grand staircase, as vicious and menacing as ever. There were still twelve of them.

Shaking from head to toe, Serenity took a slow step forward. The lifeless bodies of the four Inner Senshi, her lifelong friends, lay scattered about on the crystalline stairs, their blood staining the clear surface. King Endymion was frozen to the ground, numb with shock.

The body of Sailor Mars was nearest to the top of the stairs. The youma she had been fighting had flung her body into the air and watched it crash to the ground, broken. When all four Senshi were dead, the enemy had retreated to the base of the stairs to watch the royal couple's reaction.

Nearly stumbling, the Queen took the few steps down and fell to her knees beside the body of her best friend. Serenity's withered arms reached out to her prone form, and an almost animal sound burst from her throat. After a moment Endymion realized she was wailing, sobbing a fountain of tears as she had when she was a little girl, rocking back and forth on her aged knees as she clutched the bloody body of Mars to her chest. It was a sound he hadn't heard for ages and it chilled him to the core.

A rousing cheer of triumph erupted from the assembled Shinmosei army, filling the courtyard with its deafening sound, drowning Serenity's sorrow.

Snapping out of his frozen state, the King rushed forward and seized his wife's arm. "Serenity. Serenity!"

The Queen was startled from her mourning state at Endymion's touch, and reality came rushing back to her. Reverently laying Mars on the ground, she climbed to her feet, the front of her dress soaked in deep red lifeblood. She had known this would happen, but she could never have been prepared to see it become real.

"Their deaths can not be in vain," she muttered numbly, returning to the top of the stairs. "I must protect our people, Endymion."

The souls of the four warriors, scarred and tattered from countless years of battle, pain, and struggle, had finally reached eternal peace.--

* * *

There was a full state funeral, with all the trimmings and honors that could be had in the entirety of Crystal Tokyo. For an entire day the body of Neo Queen Serenity lay in the entrance hall of the palace in a clear crystal coffin. King Endymion had insisted that the people be allowed to pay their respects, and the line of citizens waiting for their final glimpse of their beloved Queen extended through the courtyard for the entire day.

The funeral services themselves were private, for courtiers and personal friends only. Throughout the ceremony the four Inner Senshi, in full uniform, stood in a row behind the coffin. They had been her guardians throughout her life, and they would see her through this final journey.

The body of the Queen was to be cremated on a pyre built in a private garden within the palace walls. The Inner Senshi were the pallbearers, and together they carried the crystal coffin through the corridors of the palace. They walked silently, serious expressions set firmly in stone, but all four faces were streaked with tears.

The coffin was set upon a platform in the center of the pyre, and the walls and top of the crystal case were removed. A gentle breeze was swirling through the garden, carrying the scent of fresh flowers to the noses of the solemn mourners. A few wisps of golden hair were caught by the wind, floating around the angelic face of the Queen.

Before the fire was set, Serenity's family and closest friends were permitted one final chance to say farewell. The Senshi were as professional as possible, but when it was the Princess Serenity's turn she flung herself upon the body of her mother, sobbing uncontrollably. Every heart present was sickened at the sight of young Usagi lying across the Queen's lifeless form, the Princess's hands gripping her mother's shoulders so tightly they shook. Her entire body quaked as the tears flowed out of her soul, soaking the dress she was to be burned in. Eventually Sailor Mercury approached and gently separated the Princess from the body of the Queen.

The last person to look down upon the face of Neo Queen Serenity was King Endymion. For a moment he stood motionless, gazing down upon the pale face of his soulmate as he would if they lay together in bed. She was still so perfect, still so beautiful, despite the wrinkles that creased her thin face. Endymion's mind was blank, empty. Hungrily his eyes drank in the image of his beloved wife, knowing this would be the last time he would see her. A choking lump rose in his throat and the image blurred as his midnight eyes filled with tears. The King clenched his fists and swallowed the lump, but he did not blink the tears away. Slowly his eyes overflowed their boundaries and two tears slipped down his aged cheeks.

Taking a deep breath, Endymion raised one hand in front of his chest, and removed his white glove. Closing his eyes, the King reached deep inside himself, searching for powers he had not used in ages. The energy was sluggish, and he grunted with effort as he forced the power out of his soul and into his fingers. Squeezing his eyes shut tightly, his face screwed up with the struggle, Endymion drew the energy out and focused it in the palm of his hand. He opened his eyes. He had created one perfect, long-stemmed, blood red rose.

Breathing heavily, his body weakened by effort, the King leaned forward and reverently laid the rose upon his love's bosom. Before he released the stem, he squeezed a thorn between his fingers. The sharp point bit through the skin, and a drop of blood welled up on his fingertip. His breath hurt in his chest. He was getting too old for this; he needed to rest, but he would not give up on her.

Gently, Endymion traced his wife's lips with his bloodied fingertip. They were still soft, even in death, and his blood lent the rosy color of life to the lips that had so often been pressed against his own. With her frozen lips now filled with a blush of color, she looked almost alive, as if she were merely sleeping.

The painful lump choked Endymion again as he leaned over the lifeless body and touched his warm lips to her cold mouth, for one final kiss. With his heart he begged her to respond, to yield beneath his passion and raise her arms to encircle his neck, to open her beautiful blue eyes once more, but she lay forever still. Two more tears fell from his eyes, splashing softly against her own permanently closed eyelids.

"Aishiteru, Usako."

At last, the King stepped back from the funeral pyre. There was a moment of silence as everyone assembled drowned themselves in their own private thoughts. Then Endymion gave Sailor Mars a small nod.

Stepping forward, Mars raised one hand and closed her eyes. With a small effort of concentration, a flame burst to life within her fingers. When Mars opened her eyes again, tears were once again streaming down her cheeks.

"Sayonara, Usagi-chan."

Mars extended her arm, and the flickering flame darted from her white gloved hand to the tinder spread around the body of Neo Queen Serenity. It soon became an inferno, consuming the white dress, blushing soft lips, and pale creased skin. Somehow, the red rose resisted the heat until the end, shining as a witness to an eternal promise, and bursting into flame only when the pyre burned so high that the body upon it could no longer be seen.

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink.-_

* * *

Sunlight streamed in the windows of the apartment, filling the modest rooms with a golden glow. It was already mid-morning, and the king-sized bed with the simple wooden headboard was still occupied. The curtains on the windows were drawn, but the light still filtered through enough to brighten the face of the young woman known as Tsukino Usagi. She was Chiba Usagi now.

As the sun warmed the bedroom, Usagi stirred beneath the covers. Bright blue eyes fluttered open, shining in the light. A pair of cobalt eyes were gazing down at her.

"How long have you been awake?" the golden-haired woman mumbled, stifling a yawn behind a slender hand.

"A while now." Mamoru's youthful face was smiling at his precious new wife, his skin nearly glowing with the happiness that reigned within his heart.

Usagi blushed, the color of roses rising in her cheeks. "Have you been watching me sleep?"

"Of course," Mamoru replied. "I can't think of anything in the world I'd rather be doing, or anything more beautiful to look at."

A smile slowly spread across Usagi's face, and she bit her lower lip shyly. She was radiant. Mamoru gazed into her eyes as he spoke the words that would begin a lifelong tradition.

"Aishiteru, Usako"  
"Aishiteru, Mamo-chan."

Wriggling her body beneath the covers, Usagi snuggled up to her new husband, who wrapped his strong warm arms around her. "Well, Mamo-chan," she mumbled brightly, her face against his chest, "we've had the happiest day of our lives. What comes next?"

"Isn't it obvious, Usako?" he replied, burying his fingers in the long tresses of shimmering golden hair. "We live happily ever after."

* * *

Somewhere a newly discovered Princess cradled a fallen caped protector in her slender arms, pleading with his spirit not to leave her when they had only just found one another again.

Somewhere a girl in a sailor fuku knelt on the ground, holding a simple locket, and begged a Prince to return from the embrace of evil.

Somewhere a man in a tuxedo crouched on an asteroid and held the limp body of a soldier who had sacrificed her life to save her friends.

Somewhere a trained fighter gazed upon a hovering golden prism, and knew her knight was no longer living in this world.

The trials had been many, each of them cruel and painful, threatening to undo the lovers, to divide them permanently. Yet their love did not falter but grew ever stronger, the bond between them drawing the two closer and closer to each other. In the darkest times, the light of love still burned brightly within their hearts and souls, and they knew they would reach their destiny together despite it all. The pair stood proudly beside each other for countless years, through countless memories, until their very souls became intertwined. In the end they lived as one, as the single heart they were meant to be.

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink.-_

* * *

Neo Queen Serenity and King Endymion stared at each other for a moment, both of their eyes shining with tears. The rivers of sorrow streaked Serenity's cheeks, but Endymion's tears remained unshed. They both knew what the Queen had to do, to save their people and everything they had worked to build throughout their lives. Endymion forced himself to stand firm, to hold in his tears, trying to support his wife as best he could in the task she now faced. The dozen youma were still gathered at the bottom of the staircase, and the entire army watched to see what Serenity would do. They expected her to surrender; after all, she and the King were the only remaining barrier between the invaders and the Palace.

Once again, the royal couple was startled as the doors flew open, crashing into the walls. Pink hair streaming, Princess Serenity stormed out of the gates to her mother's side, followed closely by Prince Helios. Young Usagi's crimson eyes widened as she took in the scene; the gathered army, the growling youma, the bodies of the Inner Senshi sprawled across the crystal stairs.

Weakly the Princess clutched at her mother's arm, swaying in shock. Her mouth opened and closed several times, but no sound emerged.

The entire invading army burst out into a fresh wave of laughter and cheers, filling the courtyard with the deafening roar of jeers and victory cries.

Usagi's fingers tightened on the Queen's thin arm. "Where are the Asteroid Senshi?" she asked weakly, her voice shaking as if she dreaded the answer.

"I sent them through the city to attack the Shinmosei from behind," Serenity assured her daughter. "There are no youma at the rear of the army. The Asteroid Senshi are safe."

Although her eyes filled with tears at the scene before her, Usagi tore her gaze away from the lifeless Inner Senshi and dragged her mind back to the task at hand. "Why did you not wake me?" she demanded sharply. "If Helios had not come for me, I would still be asleep!"

Turning to look at her daughter's smooth, youthful face, Serenity gave her a gentle smile. She is like I was in so many ways, and yet she is unique. Aloud she said, "Perhaps it would have been better if you had remained asleep."

The eyes of the Princess narrowed and she scowled at her mother. "That's ridiculous," she protested. "You need every Senshi you can get." As these words passed her lips, Usagi remembered her other urgent matter. "Mother, I can't find my henshin locket! It's not in my room!"

The Queen turned her face back toward the enemy, away from her daughter's sight. "I know."

Usagi paused for a moment, and then her young strong hands tightened on her mother's arm again. "What have you done? Where is it?"

"This enemy is too strong," Serenity said quietly. "There is only one path to victory remaining." Despite the roar of the crowd, the Queen's words still reached Usagi's ears as clearly as if they were alone.

"Mother, you can't!" she cried in disbelief. "There must be another way!"

The Queen shook her head solemnly, her silver-streaked twin streams of hair rippling as she moved. "This is the only way. You have seen that the Senshi are not strong enough to rid the world of this evil. I will purify the city once more. The people will need a leader when it is all over."

"I won't let you!" the Princess screamed, her voice breaking. "Crystal Tokyo needs you!"

Serenity turned back to her panicked daughter again, her vibrant blue eyes meeting tear-filled crimson. "My time is over, Chibi-Usa," she said fondly. "My story is finally coming to an end. You, Helios, and the Asteroid Senshi must rebuild our kingdom and return peace to the people. It is your turn now."

Shaking with emotion, her pink hair quivering to its tips, Usagi tried to find words that would sway her mother from her chosen path, but in her heart she knew Serenity was right. They could not defeat the enemy without the power of the Silver Crystal.

A strangely bright smile curved the Queen's lips suddenly. "When I am gone, you will be able to have the child you have wanted so badly," she added warmly. Young Usagi gulped, and the tears began freely pouring down her face. "I believe the Silver Crystal will also be reborn within you, now fully in your control. I am proud of you, my daughter," Serenity added. "You are ready to be the Queen you have always been destined to become."

Choking on her sobs, the Princess flung her arms around her mother's neck, weeping uncontrollably into her shoulder. Her waves of pink hair mingled momentarily with the gold and silver tresses of the present Queen. "Mother..."

In the courtyard, the triumphant noise had died down. The enemy army was losing its patience, tiring of waiting for the royal couple to make their next futile move. At the base of the staircase, one of the youma began to climb the crystal stairs.

The Queen and Princess separated. "Now," Serenity instructed her daughter, "retreat inside the palace with Helios. You will be safe there."

Unable to say another word, Usagi nodded. Helios took her arm, and together they entered the main doors of the crystal structure, which closed firmly behind them. Neo Queen Serenity had turned to watch her precious child disappear. She did not see the youma behind her, who had reached the center of the staircase and formed a brilliant bolt of deadly energy in its enormous hand. She only heard the electric snapping sound as the lightning of death was released, and swiftly she turned her head. It was already too late.

In front of her, between the Queen and the monsterous youma, stood the King. Energy crackled and buzzed as the lightning flowed from the youma's hand and into the King's chest. As he had so many times before, King Endymion had thrown his own body in harm's way, to protect his eternal love by sacrificing his own life.

Serenity shrieked in shock and pain as Endymion's agony echoed into her heart through the bond they shared. In this feeling she found his final wish; that she survive long enough to use the Silver Crystal to save their daughter's kingdom. If she did not do this, all would be lost, and so he became a willing martyr for that cause.

For what seemed like an eternity the attack continued, and still Endymion held his ground, refusing to crumple until Serenity's safety was assured. His age-worn body jerked and convulsed on its feet as the energy shock pummeled him mercilessly, and despite his best efforts, a cry of pain escaped his lips. Serenity stood frozen to the ground behind him as he was surrounded by a corona of electric death. She could not stop screaming. She knew this was as it should be, this was the destiny that had been preordained for them, but she could not stop screaming. The liquid pain flowed out of her soul through her voice, refusing to be silenced.

At last the barrage ended, the youma momentarily drained. The sudden silence was deafening as for a moment the King's body, its soul gone dark, hovered on its feet in final defense of Endymion's love. Then, he fell. For the Queen, time nearly stood still, the pounding of her own heart roaring in her ears like the ocean as her knight tilted slowly backwards, his hair floating around his paled face. Gently the King's knees crumpled, and Endymion slipped past Serenity's motionless form, collapsing lifeless to the crystal floor. As if in a trance, the Queen turned and looked down upon her husband. She did not need to bend down to him to know that he was no longer living. She felt it within herself, as if her heart had been torn asunder.

Beneath his dark hair Endymion's eyes were closed in an eternal sleep. The attack had assaulted his body internally, leaving his clothing undamaged. The King had fallen upon his right side, his right arm extended in front of him as if reaching out for something, his left limply dangling across his abdomen. His soft hair was in disarray, the strands lying at random. He had made the ultimate sacrifice for the woman who shared his soul.

There was no time for mourning. The other eleven youma were charging up the staircase toward the Queen, who now stood completely alone among the empty shells of her lifelong companions. Something hardened within Serenity's eyes, and she turned to face the attackers, tears flying from the corners of her clear blue eyes. She drew herself up to full height, her face seeming chiseled in stone, fury and pain radiating from her expression. Swiftly she raised her hands in front of her chest and summoned the Silver Crystal. In one fluid motion, Neo Queen Serenity thrust her arms high above her head, the crystal floating between her palms. As the youma reached the top of the stairs, a brilliant white light of utmost purity burst from the depths of the Silver Crystal and flooded the courtyard.--

* * *

Sunlight streamed in the windows of the royal suite, filling the elegant rooms with a golden glow. It was already mid-morning, and the large bed with the ornate headboard was still occupied. The bedcurtains were drawn but the light still filtered through. To the sole occupant of the bed, the light was meaningless. The light of his life was gone.

For many mornings King Endymion lay motionless in bed for hours, the days slipping away as he gazed upon the emptiness where the curving form of his golden-haired wife should have been. Sometimes he cried, and sometimes he just lay there and stared, his eyes empty and lifeless. Each day around noon, one of the Senshi would arrive to tend to the King's needs. Every day, the caretaker would try to convince Endymion to eat something, and every day he would take only a few bites before returning to his endless vigil. His heart was as empty as his bed. There was no longer a sweet blue-eyed face to wake up to, to enjoy the day with, to live for.

When a few weeks had passed, and Rei had endured another unsuccessful attempt to coax Endymion into eating a full meal, she did not leave the King in peace as they usually did. For a while she stood at his bedside, indecisive, and finally she took a deep, bracing breath.

"Your Highness," she began, trying to attract his attention. Endymion did not respond.

Furrowing her brow, Rei set her face in a determined expression, braving the risk of developing wrinkles in her skin. Now that the Queen was gone, the Inner Senshi had lost their purpose in existence, and their powers as Senshi were finally fading. Young Usagi had been crowned Queen Serenity III, and had taken over all the responsibilities of ruling Crystal Tokyo, and the Asteroid Senshi were her only destined guardians.

Boldly the violet-haired woman stepped right up to the side of the bed that had been Serenity's, placing herself firmly in Endymion's line of vision.

"Your Highness," she repeated, louder this time.

Something flickered in the emptiness of the King's eyes. He blinked, slowly, and sluggishly approached the plane of reality. His body remained motionless but his eyes rolled up to look at Rei. "What is it?"

The Princess of Mars took another deep breath. "We are very concerned about you, your High-"

The King made a slight throat-clearing sound, and Rei stopped. "Please, no more formality. Helios is King now. My name is Endymion."

Rei allowed herself a slight smile. "Endymion," she began again, choosing her words carefully, "we miss your presence in the palace. Please, won't you join us for dinner this evening?"

The King's eyes rolled back toward the bed, becoming empty again. "Why?" he asked softly. "There is no reason for me to ever rise again. There is no more light in the world for me. The darkness of this room is the same as any other."

Desperately Rei dropped to her knees beside the bed, meeting Endymion's gaze again. "I can not pretend to know how you feel," she said softly, "but our lives have become empty as well, in a way we never expected. Yet, we continue our lives, not for ourselves, but for the others who have grown to love us." Gripping the edge of the bed with her fingers, Rei leaned forward. "If not for yourself, please, do it for Chibi-Usa."

"Chibi...usa?" Endymion pronounced the words as if they were a foreign language, his lips barely moving in his mask-like face.

"She puts on a happy face because she has to," Rei informed him. "The people are depending on her to make sure everything will remain the way it has always been. Underneath, she is torn by grief. She is in constant pain, and not even Helios can comfort her. She feels as if she has lost both of her parents at once."

Again, something moved within Endymion's blank eyes. He blinked again, and at last he focused on Rei's anxious face. "Chibi-Usa," he said again, more clearly, something in his mind awakening from its slumber.

"Yes. She needs you, Endymion."

Only the pain of his daughter was able to separate the King from his living death. He began to rise and dress in the afternoon, and soon he was moving within the castle again, although slower and more solemn than he had ever been. The newly crowned Queen Serenity III was greatly comforted to have her father's presence back in her life, even if he would never again be the person he had been. Gradually she began to overcome her own pain. Endymion began eating again, and was even able to offer Serenity III some advice on issues that arose.

The former King spent much of his time in the palace gardens, wandering endlessly and aimlessly through the flowers that had been gathered from every corner of the world. Time and time again he found himself in the rose garden area, surrounding himself with the symbol of the love he had once known. In the center a life-sized white marble statue of Neo Queen Serenity had been erected, close to the place where Sailor Mars' flame had sent her body to the sky. Endymion spent countless hours standing in this garden, gazing up at the stone likeness of his wife. None of the Senshi had the heart to try to convince him to avoid this place.

Endymion had been more comfortable when his mind had been numbed, before Rei had awoken him to his daughter's needs. Now his mind worked constantly, filled with painful thoughts and memories. He had been her knight, her protector through countless battles. He had come to her rescue so many times, defending her from a wide range of terrors that nearly defied imagination. Yet, he had failed to protect her from the most deadly of assassins. He had failed. In the end, he had not been able to save her from the downward spiral.

"WHY?" he suddenly yelled aloud one day, as he stood in front of the sculpture in the gardens, his head titled toward the sky. "Why didn't you take me first? Why didn't you take me?"

This wasn't the way it was supposed to be. He, Endymion, was supposed to die before his precious Queen, defending her to the last. Now she was gone, forever out of his reach, and he was still alive.

"Why am I still here?" he moaned, dropping his head to his chest in defeat, his body shaking as more tears began to flow from his ravaged eyes, dripping with soft splashes on the stones of the walkway. "Why do I have to keep on living without her?" He knew with every inch of his being that somewhere she was waiting for him, and yet he could not go to her.

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink.-_

* * *

Pure white light flowed outward from the stone that was Neo Queen Serenity's heart and soul. The youma that had nearly reached her was thrown backward with a yell, tumbling heavily to the bottom of the staircase.

An ethereal wind sprung up from nowhere to surround the Queen, sending her strands of gold and silver hair streaming behind her as she held the crystal aloft. Her dress billowed in the storm of pure power as she drew more energy from within the core of her being. The light of the Silver Crystal grew brighter and brighter until it became blinding, but the Queen was still able to see as clearly as if it were mere daylight.

The tempest of light roared through the courtyard, growing stronger in every instant. The Shinmosei youma charged the staircase again and again, but each time they were thrown back when they had only ascended halfway.

Shining like the sun, Serenity concentrated on drawing the life energy from every particle of her body. She would need it all to complete her final task as Queen. She felt herself growing weaker, and soon she had reached that barrier beyond which there was no turning back. The crystal offered a reserve of energy that would keep her alive if she held it for herself. Instead, Serenity seized this last chance and wove it into the growing force that was concentrated within the gem that was her heart.

This process was both familiar and strange. She had stood in this posture before, hair and white gown flowing behind her in the storm of energy, draining her life to save her loved ones, but this time it was unique. This time, there would be no reincarnation.

In this moment, Serenity finally understood how her ancient mother's sacrifice had felt. Previously, when Serenity had been a Princess, a mere shadow of the Silver Millennium, this act had been frightening, even hesitant. There had always been the knowledge that there was still a future to be lived, a hidden voice whispering I don't want to die.

Now, there was only a sense of growing peace. Serenity was becoming lightheaded, her breath weakening as she poured everything she was into the Silver Crystal, glowing and pulsing above her head. This time, the future was secure. Her daughter would be there to uphold the time of peace she and King Endymion had created. Her friends and husband had gone before her, and she was ready to join them. This was right, this was the destiny that had been laid before her. It was time for the long story of Serenity to reach its completion.--

* * *

King Endymion was once again attending court, although he took a lesser seat to the side of the dais, as Queen Serenity III and King Helios filled the thrones with their regal presence. Serenity III now controlled the power of the Silver Crystal, and she had become as radiant as her mother, her rosy hair and eyes shining with life. She missed her mother terribly, but with her father's help had been able to survive the mourning process with her sanity intact.

The former King was now the one who wore a false happy face. To all the world he presented a facade of solemn contentment, as a man who had made peace with his demons. In reality, they still raged within him, threatening to tear him asunder at any moment. Endymion was chained to life, unable to reach his twin soul.

One day, when court ended, he too stumbled in weakness as he left his seat. The world swam around his eyes and he lay helplessly on the crystalline floor until the healers could transport him to the clinic wing of the palace. Although his daughter's face was filled with fear, secretly Endymion's heart was gladdened. At last I will rejoin my Serenity.

The healers, however, had other plans in mind. They treated the ailing King with a special mixture of herbs and magic that strengthened his aging body. After Endymion went to sleep that night, he dreamed of roses and fire, and a marble statue with a smiling face and open arms, waiting for him, welcoming him. Yet he awoke the next morning, still alive, still alone.

Why am I still here? TAKE ME! Please take me away, return me to her embrace. PLEASE!

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink.-_

* * *

As her body raised the alarm that it was nearing its end, that soon she would lose consciousness, Neo Queen Serenity released one final burst of effort.

Every ounce of remaining energy she possessed flooded the Silver Crystal. The power concentrated itself within the gem, and then burst.

A blinding wave of crackling energy exploded from the depths of the crystal and rolled outward, sweeping through the courtyard, through the palace, through all the structures of Crystal Tokyo and beyond. It was pure light, pure love, pure devotion to the pursuit of peace, born of a flawless desire to defend.

Where the wave encountered a heart of evil, the creature that possessed it was destroyed. Where it encountered a heart that was fundamentally good, it passed by without doing harm. The blast of energy swept throughout the city in all directions, with the Crystal at the epicenter, and flooded out into the countryside. Some Shinmosei were spared. Some citizens of Crystal Tokyo were obliterated. It would be the new Queen's task to decide what should be done with the Shinmosei whose inherent, hidden goodness had been their salvation.

As the essence of Serenity swept across the entire planet, purifying the entire population of the world, the Silver Crystal became as fragile as glass without energy to sustain it. The gem shattered. Darkness closed in on the Queen's vision. The world around her spun uncontrollably. In the center of the growing fog hovered an indistinct figure, swimming in the ether.

Gently the figure became clearer as the darkness grew in Serenity's mind. It was Endymion, her eternal knight. His arms were open to embrace her, and he was smiling, waiting to congratulate her on a task well done. Surrounding him were four young women, whose faces Serenity knew very well, each of them alight with smiles and expressions of joy. Summoning up her last breath, Serenity's lips were barely able to form the last words they would ever speak, before she surrendered to the darkness and released herself from Crystal Tokyo forever.

"Aishiteru, Mamo-chan."

Serenity's eyes lost their sparkle, becoming deep and empty. Her arms dropped to her sides as she began to fall. Slowly she drifted, her white royal dress fluttering around her, graceful tresses of gold and silver hovering in the air. Gently the Queen fell backward, her eyes closing, her lifeless body pulling dress and hair and trailing hands down to the ground, where she fell upon the outstretched arms of her fallen knight.

Her head resting beside that of her husband, her slender form lying across his extended arm, Neo Queen Serenity entered her eternal rest in the arms of the man who had supported her faithfully since the time of the Silver Millennium. They would lie together for the rest of eternity, never again separated.--

* * *

Time dragged on for King Endymion. He was beginning to fear that his misery would never come to an end, when at last the Fates smiled upon him.

As he wandered the palace gardens one afternoon, the world began to tilt beneath his feet. Endymion's head swam, and suddenly the sky was in front of his face. He lay flat on his back, his head spinning. He could not seem to get enough air into his lungs. Above him there were faces, blurred faces, and strange, panicked voices.

Somewhere in the mess he discovered a string of words.

"Someone fetch the healers, quickly!"

Summoning all his strength, Endymion raised one hand in protest. "No," he commanded, his voice surprisingly firm. "It is at last my time to leave this place."

A drop of liquid burst on Endymion's pale face. Trying to focus, he managed to make out the hovering image of his daughter, her bright hair crowning her beautiful face. She was crying, and calling out his name. With only a little effort, Endymion smiled.

"Do not cry, Chibi-Usa," he said softly. "My time is over. It is time for you to write your own story, my daughter. Be strong."

Turning his head back toward the sky, Endymion gazed at the white shapes that hovered above his face. The clouds moved and danced, their pure whiteness bringing an image of a flowing white dress to his spinning mind. Endymion's eyes narrowed as he tried to make the world stop shifting around him.

The image began to coalesce, and suddenly it was her. Serenity, his wife, his soulmate, standing there in all her beauty, only a short distance from him. She was holding out her arms to Endymion, welcoming him into her embrace. A brilliant smile was setting her face alight, and her eyes were a more vibrant blue than ever. Her skin glowed with radiance. She was young again, in the prime of her life, and something about her dress was different. She had been transformed once again into Princess Serenity, his dearest love, heir to the Moon Kingdom of the Silver Millennium.

In the world of the living, Queen Serenity III knelt beside her father's fading life. Although she desperately wanted him to stay with her, in her heart she knew that this was the end of his time, and this was what he wanted.

Slowly her father's arm lifted from the ground, and he raised his hand toward the sky, reaching for something. Serenity III leaned forward to take his hand in her own, but something made her hesitate. Endymion's eyes were not fixed on her.

"Usako," the former King whispered weakly.

Shuddering, Serenity III gulped back her tears, clutching her hands to her own chest. If she were to touch him now she would only hinder his journey, tying him to the world of the living. She struggled to keep her voice steady as she leaned close to her father's ear.

"Go to her, Father," she whispered, her voice breaking despite her will. "You will be sent to the sky by fire, as we sent her, so you can be together, I promise. Please, tell Mother that I love her."

For one final moment Endymion's mind hovered between two worlds. "I will tell her, Chibi-Usa," he whispered.

His arm extending as far as it could reach toward the sky, two final words escaped Endymion's whitened lips.

"Aishiteru, Usako."

As darkness began to fill Endymion's vision he was suddenly floating, rising into the air. The pain began to fade away as he sailed toward the outstretched arms of Princess Serenity. At last he was at her side, she gathered him into her loving embrace, and they were gone.

* * *

_Lyrics removed because FFdotNET is run by a bunch of fascists. If you'd like to read the unedited version, go to a reasonable archive like ASMR or Aria's Ink.-_

* * *

Well, Mamo-chan, we've had "happily ever after." What comes next?  
We shall see, Usako. We shall see.

* * *

The Final End

The Eternal Peace

* * *

Final Author's Notes:

I actually started crying while I was writing this. I've never done that before. I was just typing along, not even thinking about the words or picturing the scene in my mind, and then next thing I knew I was all choked up and there were tears on my cheeks. Hopefully that means it's a good fanfic. This is not really intended to be a tragic story; if I wrote it correctly, it should project a feeling of peaceful completion.

I finished this in three days. Must be a record for me.

I'm afraid I might have gone through some parts of this story a little fast, because I was so eager to get all my thoughts written out. Also there are probably a lot of details I left out because I was trying to focus only on Serenity and Endymion. If something seemed rushed, or if I neglected some details and it really bothered you, please let me know and I will try to fix the problem. I want this story to be as good as it can be. Also, please tell me if you thought the two-story format was too confusing. I toyed with the idea of calling them "Bitter" and "Sweet," but how do you decide which version is bitter and which is sweet?

I welcome any comments you might have, and I live for constructive criticism. .

I hope you enjoyed my work.  
-Dejana

7/18/2003

* * *

"As In Autumn" fanfiction copyright 2003 by Dejana Talis

With lyrics to "As In Autumn," by Margot Wagner

Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon and its associated characters and canon belong to Naoko Takeuchi and Kodansha. The text of this creative work, with the exception of the song lyrics, was created by Dejana and is her exclusive property. Not to be used without permission. Sailor Moon Says: Don't steal! .


End file.
